Vetting men

So the vetting process continues.  I am starting to have a firm idea about what I am really looking for, which I guess is a good thing.  I have decided, definitely,  I need a man who can carry on conversation.  I am not attracted to the strong, silent type.  I can talk for a while, but at some point I need feedback on what I've said, not just silence...waiting to be filled.

I also have decided that if a man NEVER asks me about myself, he is not for me.  I had one man very angry with me for not telling him EVERYTHING about myself in the first or second e-mail.  He asked me nothing about myself but shared about himself after I asked him a bunch of questions, and then said he had given me everything and I had given him nothing.  I can't imagine trying to have anything resembling a HOH relationship with someone who gets that angry, that quickly, without asking for what he wants. 

I also need to have someone who can write in complete sentences.  I try not to be a snob about things, but at least take a moment to write more than a series of words that convey something like" spanking bare bedroom".  Yes, that conveys meaning, but it doesn't tell me much about yourself and I really, really want to get to know someone who I'm contemplating getting intimate with and making myself that vulnerable. When I asked him directly to tell me about himself he said, "I am Catholic".  Okay, good, but is that all you want me to know and do you want to know about me?

Then, there was the guy who wanted to know if I was white, if I had ever been spanked and what if I didn't like it.  I responded and he didn't write back...surprise, surprise, surprise. Well, not really surprising because I knew there were men out there who are are only about the spanking and that just isn't going to be enough for me.  I would like to thank Susie and Korey for giving me their input on things on that front.  It really helped me to solidify my thoughts and feelings on a lot of things especially what is most important in a relationship for me.

The above three probably prepared me for the man who is the front runner at this point.  He writes in complete sentences, we talk about things other than dd, he asks me about myself and he sends quick notes when he isn't going to be able to e-mail me right away to continue our conversation. The e-mails we exchange do tend towards the long side, so I think he wants me to know that he is interested, but busy. I expect we'll be moving to phone conversations soon.

I am casting a wide net and not just putting all my eggs in one dating pool or should that be beach balls ;-). Things in the dating world are very fluid, but with everyone I talk to, and with the support of my blogland sisters, I feel like I am getting closer all the time to finding my guy and that makes me feel good about things.