It's about service

So, I have been reading a lot of blogs about how people interact within their marriage.  I have come to think it is a lot about being in service to one another.  Wives who behave a certain way and submit to their husbands wishes as a way to show their love and be in service to their men and their marriage.  The same is true of the husbands, they watch their wives carefully and give them what they are looking for and need (even if they don't think they do right in that moment).  I remember a definition of "adult" I heard a long time ago that seems apropos.  It is "A child can only look inward and adult can look outward".  I think that is what that idea of service is all about.  When we look at how we can help the other person get their needs met, when we set aside our desires (not needs) to be in service to the marriage and each other.

Another thought I had about this is a description of heaven.  It says heaven and hell are set up exactly the same way.  Everyone is sitting at a round table with food in the very middle of the table and they all have these very long spoons.  It is impossible to get the food into your own mouth.  In hell everyone starves.   In heaven, they feed each other.

I think I am especially thinking about this after spending the long weekend with my extended family.  It is pretty male heavy.  What I saw was men in service to the women who were there.  They were looking out to be sure every one was included and no one got left behind.  They asked the helpful questions, "Can I carry you bag?"  "Are you going to be okay leaving for the airport?"  One of them even drove home (2 hours) at 10 o'clock at night because as one of the other men said, "His wife needs him to be there to comfort her."

It must be nice to be able to relax, to be in a relationship that is about service to each other and to the relationship, and when everything is working as it should be, all your needs are met.